Better Not Bare Your Buttocks To The Innocent Bystanders.

Has this week been super long? I think this week has been super long.
Just thought I'd throw that out there for your consideration.

SO. I have a story to tell you.
There we were. Me, my curly-haired best-bud Ashley (known by myself as Ashatay), and my extraordinarily tall friend Aaron's mother were all sitting in a car. Aaron's mother's car, to be exact.
There THEY were. The baseball boys. They were preparing for their game, all their cars parked in the same area, BLASTING some awful country music from their car speakers. I'm talking TWANGY country. Like, "my tractor is my only love because my girlfriend stole my car and my dog and now I'm gonna go sleep with lots of other women, that'll show her." THAT stuff. Nothing too terribly weird about it, other than the fact that they're willingly putting their ears through such torture. I'm sorry if you like country music. I'm allergic to it. It makes me break out.

That was when they started to take their pants off. Just strippin' down to their little spandex shortie thingies that they're trying to pass off as underwear. The three of us being fairly modest females, we all grimace, make an "ewh" face and look away.
BUT THEY AREN'T DONE.
Several minutes later, after they've lulled us into a false sense of security by putting their pants on, I turn around, looking for Aaron. I am met with a round, pale, shockingly hairy bare boy ass staring me in the face. YES, STARING. It was saying, "I HAVE JUST BRANDED MYSELF INTO YOUR BRAIN. YOU WILL NEVER GET THIS PICTURE OUT OF YOUR HEAD. FEAR MY HAIRINESS." I started yelling things like, "OHMYGOD, OHMYGOD, OHMYGOD." Aaron's mother was yelling things like, "EWH EWH EWH." She started to drive away and Ashley, who missed the whole thing, was yelling things like, "MY EYES ARE CLEAN. MY EYES ARE CLEAN!"
He and his buddies noticed and pointed and laughed at us.

I am scarred for life. FOR LIFE, I TELL YOU.

But you know what I was thinking after we left and I recovered slightly?
What the HELL did the people in FRONT of him see?

Love
Love
Love
Samm

Song Quote Of Note: "I'm sure I could be a movie star if I could get out of this place."
Title: Piano Man.
Artist: Billy Joel.
^^^CAPITAL song. Just fantastic.