It's been reduced to occasional nose-faucet moments and little dry coughs.
My family and myself went to my grandparents' house this weekend celebrate Jesus's ability to not die properly. We drove down on my sick day and had pizza and all that jazz, and just happened to come in during the WORST MOVIE EVER: Journey to the Center of the Earth. The one with Brendan (Brenden? I don't like him enough to check the correct spelling of his name) Fraser (Frazier? Frasier? See previous parentheses). It's not the worst movie or anything very significant in the events of this weekend, I just had to say that because it truly is terrible, and if I didn't warn you, you might watch it and then I'd be responsible for your brain melting, boiling, and then jumping out of your head and running away screaming.
That could be bad.
The next day, I actually got SUNBURNED. Yes. It was warm and gorgeous outside, so I spent the entire day humiliating myself outside playing football. But, it was fantastic, and my cousin told me all about how he got to see Billy Joel and Elton John in concert and the very old gay man that sat next to him. His name was Dan, and apparently he got very excited over the fact that someone my cousin's age (my age) knew so much about B.J and E.J (we will not pause to make fun of Billy Joel's initials. Let's be semi-adults here for a moment). He also informed me that in his Spanish class, he enjoys saying everything in what he calls his "creepy Mexican voice" to aggravate his teacher.
He's my hero.
I ended up a bit Rudolph-ish.
That night, we were all getting ready for bed. You know how you pack all your bathroom items in a little plastic thingie or a Ziploc bag? Mine are in the former, thanks to a very useful Christmas present I got. Well, here's the thing. You know hand soap? How it's in those bottles where you press on the top of them (apologies for the terrible sentence structure, I just couldn't think of a better way to put it)? Do NOT put those in with anything else, because it will get EVERYWHERE. Inevitably. It will happen.
This DID happen.
I thought I'd gotten all of it off my toothbrush. But I didn't. So when I stuck it in my mouth and brushed and saw there was way more foam than normal (I couldn't taste it until after I'd spit the toothpaste out. Weird, right?), I realized...oh God, I just brushed my teeth with soap.
It was disgusting. It reminded me of what it would be like to eat some sort of plant. I don't know what kind of plant I was thinking of, but not a good plant. It just seemed plantish to me.
This morning, when we got up to go to church, I took a shower. My grandparents have certain bathrooms they like us all to use (one is the guys' and one is the girls' and one is just a bathtub, no shower, and one doesn't have a bathtub OR shower), and the girls' bathroom has a window in it. Just a random window, and not one of those frosted windows you see on showers and in some bathrooms. There is no place in the bathroom you can stand that will not be in view of the window. Of course, it didn't occur to me to just change in the shower, so I was drying off and putting my clothes on very cautiously, sneaking glances out the window to make sure the neighbors weren't peeking over their fence or whatever.
I DID, however, see some squirrels. Three. One was on the ground, and two were on the fence, just kind of sitting there and twitching (squirrels do not sit still, ever. They vibrate). It felt like they were watching me. I BET THEY WERE ROBOT SQUIRRELS. And the neighbors sent them to spy on the visitors while we were in the bathrooms!
Peeping Tom, this is Squirrel 100 requesting backup, they have dogs, repeat, DOGS.
It was fun, though. We got all prettied up and ate junk food and stuff. Not necessarily in that order, but you know.
Happy Easter!
Love
Love
Love
Samm
Song Quote Of Note: "If I could say what I wanna say/I'd say I wanna blow you away/Be with you every night/Am I squeezing you too tight?"
Title: Things I'll Never Say.
Artist: Avril Lavigne.
^^^THIS SONG IS IN MY HEAD
P.S. My cousin got me wanting to listen to Billy Joel and Elton John, so you should listen to Lullaby and The Longest Time and Piano Man (by the former) and Tiny Dancer and Someone Saved My Life Tonight (by the latter). Well, obviously because when I wanna listen to something I HAVE to recommend it to you.
Mafia Squirrel. Be afraid.
Heck yes.
ReplyDeleteOh my. Maybe you're just part albino. But you being a vampire is much more interesting...let's go with that.